What are the differences and connections between parenting and children’s health?

Parenting is a collection of parenting behaviors covering all dimensions of child growth. Children's health is not only the core anchor of parenting, but also the core yardstick for verifying the rationality of parenting methods. There are clear differences in scope and orientation between the two, and they are deeply bound and influence each other in actual parenting scenarios.

The most common misunderstanding that many new parents make is to equate the two, thinking that "parenting is about maintaining health", but in fact it is not. I have been doing parenting science popularization in the community for almost 5 years, and I have met a family with a 3-year-old boy. Both parents are clinicians. They have been very strict about the baby's eating and drinking since he was a child. He is not allowed to touch bulk snacks outside, cannot play with children who have just caught a cold, and is not even allowed to touch sand and soil. When he reaches kindergarten age, the baby does not even dare to touch the public slides, and he is unfamiliar. The environment made parents cry by the hem of their clothes. During the child health assessment, the social adaptability items did not meet the standards. Only then did the parents realize that they had only focused on the "not getting sick physically" before, completely ignoring the social and frustration-resilient aspects of parenting, and also missing the psychological and adaptable dimensions of children's health. To put it bluntly, the boundaries of parenting are much wider, ranging from the temperature of water for preparing milk powder, teaching children to say "thank you", to how to provide sex education to children, and how to help children deal with conflicts in school. As long as parents actively intervene in their children's growth, it is oriented to help children grow into a complete person who can independently adapt to society. ； Children's health is a more focused status indicator. The definition currently used in the industry is the WHO's definition, which includes three levels of physical, psychological and social adaptability. Its orientation is clearer, which is to ensure that the child's growth foundation is not damaged. The most controversial topic among parents right now is "Will advanced enlightenment hurt the baby?" This is essentially a cognitive difference between the two: one group believes that practicing concentration and learning knowledge in advance can help children expand their cognitive boundaries. Good cognitive development itself is a part of children's health. As long as the method is right, there will be no problem. ； The other group believes that advanced enlightenment crowds out children's outdoor activities and sleep time, and that long-term pressure on children will destroy immunity and cause emotional problems, sacrificing health for short-term growth.

In fact, most of the people arguing about this are theoretical people who have never raised a baby. Once you have actually raised a baby, you will know that there is no way to clearly separate the two. The mother downstairs in my house enrolled her child in four interest classes. She had to go to class every day from Monday to Friday. As a result, her child had a recurring cough for a month and took several medicines. Later, the interest classes were reduced to only one of her favorites: painting. She ran around the neighborhood for half an hour after school every day. The cough got better within two weeks. The numbers that she had not learned for half a month could be counted smoothly while playing. You see, when there is a health problem, no matter how many parenting plans you make, they will not come to fruition. On the other hand, if you have the right parenting style and are willing to chat with your baby more and expose your baby to different environments, your baby will be in a good mood and have strong adaptability, and the probability of getting sick will be much lower. When I do science popularization, I always tell parents that raising children is like driving a long-distance car. Parenting is all the operations of holding the steering wheel, stepping on the accelerator and brake, adjusting the air conditioner, and planning the route. Children's health is the condition of the car. You can't just focus on the condition of the car and not drive to the destination, nor can you just rush to speed regardless of whether the car has an alarm or whether there is enough gas. When driving, you have to keep an eye on the condition of the car and adjust operations. How can there be any black and white boundaries?

In the final analysis, there is no absolutely correct formula for parenting, and there is no 100% child-free child. As long as you pay more attention to your child's condition every time you adjust your parenting style - whether his food is delicious, his sleep is stable, and whether he is willing to take the initiative to share happy things with you, you will have almost found the balance between the two.